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There is a man that I know only by name, who lived a peaceful life. I look to that man, morning and night, and thought to wish to be like him. Only to know, I never will. Yet, I know now to find peace in myself, and to vanquish that which consumes me. Not alone but with him and others.

I thank the Father that which provided him gingerly to us. Forever, a sinner, but in him. I find grace.

I know many others struggle out in this world, deny these ideas. I pray nothing more than your safety. I pray nothing more for you. You and every human being out there is beautiful. In our own estranged ways, we are all beautiful. Even when we're horrible. I find it is the negativity in ourselves that festers into these actions. To choose to love is far more strong.

Romans 13:8
"Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law."

I have failed many of times in this prospect and I write here-- Partially as testament to myself and to him. I see so many faults in myself, my capability to lie, to sin, and to judge so horribly. This anger made me a bad person at times. Often times ignoring people or being rude by accident. It's as Paul stated to the Romans.

Romans 7:15
"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do."

To those who read this, know I am forever grateful because it likely means you care more about me than I can ever know. I thank every person in my life for being apart of it. As with every friend, every enemy, and every fault. I have learned to love and to understand. I'm sorry for every wrong I've done. Every lie conceived. I am trying to do better, The Father be my Witness, Christ be my Judge. I will try to do better through him.