As a religious man, I look up to my lorde and saviour. I fantasise about being all-powerful, creating vast lands, peoples, and creatures to sprawl from coast to coast. Unfortunately for me, I live in the realm of the mortals, and will never taste the sweet sweet power that comes from the heavens. This game lets me scratch the itch in my brain that says "my small town sucks - what if I could start over and make it better?". Ostriv delivers exciting game play for those of you, like me, who enjoy managing people, systems, and get upset when a family leaves because there aren't enough shoes on the market - do I look like I work for Footlocker? This is a low-stress city builder, and one of the most enjoyable I have ever played.

Mordhau. What a game. "No RDM" the mods furiously type into the chat, but my name is Jared, I'm 18 years old and I never learned how to read. While the other players screech, I frolic around the map, poking other players in their soft, unprotected heads with a rapier. Was this the way the game was meant to be played? Absolutely not. But when you run with akimbo rapiers, throw one into a nearby skull before lunging at another unsuspecting combatant, the thrill is immeasurable. Sure, I've been banned from so many servers I'm not allowed to play anymore. But hearing the furries (yes, I would RDM specifically on their servers) rage filled my tiny little heart with joy. 10/10 would recommend this game.

Alright, lets talk about Rocket League. This game is about cars. And balls. Great, big, monstrous balls. And goals. You ever heard of Soccer? What about Football? They're the same game, and basically this. If it was also kind of hockey, and also a bit ridiculous. Think you're an MLG gamer? Top tier elite on the controller? Well hopefully you have a 1ms refresh rate and 144hz, because if you don't, you're going to be missing shots like me in beer league. But thats okay, because most people that aren't Champ or Grand Champ have no map awareness or any understanding of positions. Coverage? They think you're talking about their health insurance. No, Randy, I'm not talking about your dental coverage - I'm talking about you cycling back to save a goal. We can't be 3 deep like we just brought home a Tinderella, someone has to make a save. Anyway, this game is fun if you don't sweat like you're on a 3 week Doritos and Mountain Dew binge while playing. Keep your rage comments to yourself, and maybe hit your teammates (or opponents) with a "Nice Save!" when they absolutely whiff.

Its like league of legends except theres no master yi and and nobody follows me when i say "ALL MID OR GG!!!!" so 1/10 would not recommend

Whenever I sit down and say "hey, maybe I'll play a quick game of CiV," I end up looking homeless after I leave my room for the first time in 3 days mumbling "I KNEW I should've dropped a Nuke on Washington!!!!" as I slit my wrists in the bathtub.