You spawn in.
Grass rustles.
I don’t die — they die.
Was it a hacker? A rat? Their own fear of my giga-presence?
No idea. Nikita watches me from a distance and nods respectfully.

I take one step — BOOM.
The ground shakes.
My calves are so powerful the sound alerts every scav on the map, but that’s fine.
Let them come.
Free loot delivery.

I peek a corner.
Stamina? Don’t need it.
I breathe pure M855A1.
My gun fires before I even press the button because it knows what I want.

A scav yells at me in Russian.
I yell back in broken Slavic-Chad energy, and he drops dead out of intimidation.
No bullets exchanged.
Just vibes.

I throw a grenade — it doesn’t bounce back.
It bounces forward, apologizes, and wipes the squad for me.

My teammate? Dead.
Why?
He tried to loot before I said it was safe.
Natural selection.

I crawl into extract holding 1.2 million rubles in gear, a busted thorax, and the confidence of a man who hasn’t showered in three wipes.

Nikita watches from the heavens and whispers:
“Bold of you to queue again… I respect it.”

And I do. Because I’m a Tarkov Chad.

i loved the plot <3 (doing this for the steam awards)

I like being an annoying chicken in the game :3

I love downloading True music addons and just sit in a car or building just vibing with friends.

10/10

spam dome shield and land mines and you'll win literally every game 10/10

Raven is my childhood crush <3

OMG THE BUPPY IS SO CUTE <3

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