💦 FULL SET: Profiles/ - HD Photos!

Single people: “Wanna get crazy and handcuff me tonight?”
Married people: “Wanna get crazy and add bacon to the sandwiches tonight?”
-------If you see 2 homeless guys hitting eachother with cardbaord is it considered a pillow fight?

Dear old lady hitting her bushes with a broom, I'm not sure of your reasons, but carry on... Sincerely, very amused.
(\__/)
(>'.'<)
(")_(") There’s a very short list of things you can have in your hand while running without looking crazy
,___,
[O.o]
/)__)
-"--"- ....Did the aliens send the death threat yet? yea...but they gave it a name,and dance to it!....They called it dubstep!--------------
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.


I start to feel really anxious when my work piles up. I never know what to ignore first.

Dear toilet that automatically flushes, I wasn't done yet. Calm the F*** down.

When I get older, I don't want people thinking, "what a sweet old lady..." I want them to worry, "I hope she's not armed..."


Dear people in Febreeze commercials,
What was going through you mind when someone came up to you in the streets, blind folded you, led you to a crusty old bed, and told you to "BREATH DEEPLY?!"
Sincerely, what part of that did not spell rape?


gonna make a Twitter account called "that creepy guy in the white van" and follow everyone.

I’m still waiting for the episode of Storage Wars where there’s a homeless guy living in the unit
☐ single ☐ taken ☑ dropping out of society to live in the wilderness as a unicorn


my Instagram its kaspartiffany / facebook=tiffany kaspar