EscortFish Some people think I'm like a porn dude, spending my days cut off from the rest of the world, never socializing with people and masturbating online with an erect penis and buckets of lube. That's not true. I socialize a lot with live people, usually involving putting my ring in one or more of her holes; escort sites like EscortFish can help a lot with that.

I know what you're thinking." Pornhooks can pull up all kinds of top-tier ponytails when you're such a fucking stud. You don't have to go online and pay to find a girl." Because it's convenient, my pervy friends, I'm in a different city code, but EscortFish.ch is registered all over the US and Canada. If you're running from the FBI in a town you've never heard of, or trying to catch a hooker in your backyard, it's nice to have a little road map.

Catching hookers on the spot

EscortFish's home page is boring as hell, with only a list of countries, states and cities broken down by province. Aside from a barely stylized logo, there are no graphics. The design looks like something between a red ribbon and a Jesus fish, but obviously implies an exchange of money and sex with prostitutes. I suppose there's an obvious joke here that Jesus used to be good friends with prostitutes, but was kicked out of the church because he masturbated so many times in the hymnal.

Every major city in the upper half of North America is covered. From Chicago to Detroit, Vancouver to Montreal, you can get your penis wet tonight. We have smaller cities, too, so you don't have to go far to find a woman. Better use incognito mode on your browser, you don't know your wife has seen local Asian escorts to rid you of yellow fever.

EscortFish differs from many escort sites in that it is an aggregator, not an ad service. Instead of getting ads from sex workers themselves, EscortFish collects them from sites like CityXGuide, SkipTheGames and EscortAlligator. The site is so well designed that I didn't realize it was an aggregation of listings until I saw a little disclaimer at the bottom. They "are not the authors of any content."

Cheaper than dating, if you do the math.

Once you pick your city, EscortFish lays out girls like chunks of meat. Admire row after row of miniatures of hot sluts ready to sell you hot pussy. Some of them hide their faces to show off their other wares, but depending on where you are, you'll see more pretty eyes and cute smiles. In big cities, there tends to be a legal gray area, such as escort sites. Girls in rural areas are more concerned about their anonymity.

Sketches show only a minimum of information, but it is the most important element. It's helpful to have age labels to the right of the Escort F thumbnails, even if you can't use the slider to select the age range you're comfortable withWhen it's time to make a purchase from Poonani, phone numbers and other necessary contact information will be in bold on the side of the page. You won't have to register and find out that your child paid a fat girl to step on your balls, but only for half an hour. You may be a pervert, but you won't blow your entire college fund. Still.

EscortFish.ch is different from most escort sites, with some unique advantages and disadvantages. The lack of search filters is a little frustrating, especially if you live or bang in a big city, but your John in a small town won't have the same problem of overwhelming selection. EscortFish is an aggregator of sex worker ads, and it's one central site. That means it's like browsing a bunch of escort sites from one portal. That's a major strength of the site, and in most cases it probably outweighs the frustration of having to manually sift through all the prostitute options like a caveman to an iPhone. You don't even have to register to browse the girls or text them, so you don't lose anything.