🔞 ADULT: Profiles/ - Full Gallery 2025

Step I:
The Gathering of Elements (Get your stuff.)
The Twin Shields of the Grain: Acquire two slices of Stale Resilience. Bread. It's bread. Use whatever you have, but not that fancy wet artisan loaf. You'll just make soup. -_-

The Sun-Cursed Effigy: Plunder the Frostbound Casket of Preservation. Your fridge, bruh. Retrieve the Orange Effigy of the Cow. Cheese. Cheddar is fine. American will work better, but I know you're going to be fancy about it. Slice it. Don't just hack at it. Medium-thin. This isn't a cheese steak.

The Golden Grease of Slick Passage: Find the Pale Butter of the Churned Beast. (Butter. Margarine. Whatever. It's in the door of the fridge). It should be softened. Leave it out for ten minutes. Or, if you are a creature of hubris, microwave it for 5-7 seconds ONLY. You turned it into oil, didn't you? :O I can feel it. Start over. T_T

Step II:
The Crucible of Fire (Use a pan.)

Conjure the Iron Hearth: Take your heaviest, blackest skillet. That one non-stick pan that isn't totally scratched. Place it on the stove. Apply heat to medium-low. Not high. I see your hand drifting toward "High." STOP. You will incinerate your offering >:().

The Anointment: Smear the Grease on one side of each bread slice. This is absolutely non-negotiable. Place the slices such that the un-greased sides face each other, creating a sanctuary to place the Effigy. Place the cheese in the middle of the dry sides. That's obvious :/

The Assembly: Place one slice, butter-side-down, in the pan. Pile on your cheese. Top with the second slice, butter-side-up. This is, like, where people screw it up. If you mess this up, I would know.
Step III:

Patience shall be tried and the spool shall turn-Just wait and flip.

The Siege: Wait. WAIT. (Seriously. Go stare at a wall. The bread needs to turn a perfect golden brown. You'll hear it sizzle softly. If you see smoke, you've lost.)
The Great Inversion (The Flipping): When the bottom is gloriously gilded, take up your Spatula, the Flipper of Fates (Your spatula. The one with the slightly melted handle). Slide it underneath with confidence. Commit. Flip the whole thing in one smooth motion. If cheese escapes, that's on you. You built it wrong.

Step IV:

The Locked Melting (Complete the task.)

The Pressing: Gently press down with the spatula. This encourages union. It helps the cheese melt. You can also let the pan be covered with a lid for a minute if your cheese is being stubborn. It will be, because you didn't use American.

Pulling it out: When the other side is also golden and the cheese is visibly molten, pull it out. Place it on the Cutting Plate of Cooling. (A plate. Use a normal plate) LET IT REST FOR ONE MINUTE. I know you want to bite it. You will burn the roof of your mouth, and you will deserve it.

Step V:
Consumption: Slice it diagonally, because you're that kind of person. :P

Behold the sad, perhaps-not-so-stringy Cheese Pull (It snapped right away? I told you to use other cheese. >:| )

Now you should have made a functional grilled cheese sandwich. It is probably fine. Not amazing, but fine. :/

Your kitchen is in disarray now, and you've got one pan that needs to soak. :(