Your mother got a BIG shock when she first saw the website of the same name. Perhaps because she was used to her father's small cock and the cheap dildos she bought on Amazon. Many women would be satisfied with these skimpy dicks, but some prefer something bigger, more sophisticated, or just plain fancy. Of course, I do most of my masturbation with my own hands or with a machine made from a can of Pringles and an old Walkman motor, but sometimes I like to diversify things with something more realistic, or vice versa.

BigShocked.com is a company that offers quality fantasy dildos and other atypical sex toys. The company was founded in 2014, inspired by founder JOOL's concept of creating a heterotopia of eroticism. It's a very lofty term, even for a professional masturbator and pornographer like me, but I get the gist: any geek on Etsy can sell a deformed cast of rectal prolapse, but with 100,000 visitors a month they're not going to sell some half-assed nonsense. Feelings. Maybe today is the day I move on to the sex toy I don't make myself, the one they recommend every time I end up in the ER with my dick stuck in a vacuum cleaner.

I'm in for a big shock with this crazy dildo.

I don't know if you know me, but your old friend ThePornDude is a pervert. For almost a decade now, he's been spending most of his waking hours waving his penis around in perverted corners of the Internet. I'm no stranger to weird niches and obscure fetishes, and I've long known about dragon dildos and artificial horse dicks. They appear in fancy tubes and in random homemade OnlyFans movies. Although they've always been associated with gothic lolita and cosplay chic, they've proven to be more popular lately than I thought.

The topics of masturbation and sex toys often come up during interviews before PornDudeCasting on the couch. The Hitachi wand has been a favorite for years, as have the gentle, nimble fingers of porn stars. What really surprised me was when they mentioned fantasy dildos, such as those produced by BigShocked. These girls have access to the biggest and most famous real dicks in the world, and sometimes they even get turned on by real monster dicks.

The company's catalog has expanded to include insane artificial dicks, but perhaps BigShocked's biggest attraction is still the dicks. There's an incredible collection of animal, monster and fantasy dildos. A 17-inch replica of a human pig is advertised at the top of the home page, but it is somewhat overshadowed by the spectacle of colorful silicone tentacles, a dog dinger with a double insertion on suction cups and a ribbed werewolf slang with big balls.

Its realism is simply outrageous. Big Shock has shockingly huge dildos modeled on German shepherds, wolves, Doberman pinschers, curly retrievers and big Danes. In fact, I'm curious to see how much research they've done and how anatomically correct they are for each breed. But it doesn't matter. All that matters is that they are fun to play with.

Fake Dragon Cock Review.

BigShocked lets you shop by function (big dildos, vibrating dildos, anal dildos), by shape (animal dildos, horse dildos, dog dildos, alien dildos) or by multiple colors, including glow-in-the-dark options. In other words, if you want accuracy, it would be a damn shame if you had to pretend that your alien abductor/abuser didn't have glowing ovaries. Big shocker, love your deviations too much, as it happens.

Like any good modern site, BigShocked.com allows customers to leave ratings and reviews. (It's a very bad sign these days if a site doesn't have reviews). I checked user reviews of the Barghest Small-Sized Fantasy Wolf Knot Dildo, an intimidating-looking freak dick, and got a 5-star rating. Absolutely adore this dildo." One excited visitor wrote:" My husband wanted to diversify his bedroom environment and I found this. I liked the price and the quality."

At the same time, I wish you could sort the collection by customer rating, as you can do in other online stores. There are the usual options like sorting by newness or price that I think would be relatively easy to implement - Big Shocked's selection of crazy dildos is very wide, so even if you have an idea of what you want, these reviews can really help make your decision easier.

Some of the new additions to the collection are featured on the home page.Nowadays there are rotating, vibrating and spinning electronic dildos, sea monster tentacles and glow-in-the-dark Texas wolf tongues. Not only do they look cool, they are also very practical. The wolf tongue, for example, looks wild, is made of multicolored silicone and is "cleverly designed to follow your curves, designed to detect the G-spot." It also "perfectly replicates the tenderness and softness of your tongue, and the embossed grain more effectively increases friction." I don't think your wife is going back to boring micro penises anytime soon, buddy.

There's even a product for straight men.

Big Shock's best sellers are the otherworldly dildos, but there are others that might appeal to those who don't want to put alien appendages in their mouths. I'm looking at you, straight man. You might be interested in a few dozen high-end male masturbators. They're a step or two more advanced than the funky sleeves you buy in the porn store at the freeway exit.

The onahole catalog is divided into two main categories: onahole autos and real onaholes. First, I checked the auto type by deleting the last joke I wrote about its high price. For a premium sex toy, the price is really pretty darn reasonable.

If you've studied my reviews of sex shops and adult stores or have done your own research, you already know that automatic penis straighteners usually cost around $100 and are rapidly increasing in price. By comparison, the most expensive BigShocked device costs $100, and cheaper devices start at $50. A non-automated Fleshlight imitation also sells for $30. That's less than half of what you can pay for an entry-level model of a famous toy.

The same was true in the realistic masturbator department: compared to stores like Tantaly and Joy Love Dolls, some of these silicone female parts are a hell of a bargain. A realistic big ass with an open vagina and anus is $40, and a 15-pound disembodied sexy torso is $20. Of course, we're also taking a closer look at the Fantasy Bent-Over Bubble Butt Mega Stroker.

Of course, BigShocked.com is known for its fantasy sex toys. I'd love to see weird alien orifices, but maybe the market isn't ready for that yet. But if you're looking for something weird to stick your penis in, they have unusual masturbation strokers. They also have rainbow-colored fuck holes at the moment, but I'm hoping for a pair of palpable, oddly shaped boobs with slimy pumps.

If you're looking for fantasy dildos modeled after non-human creatures like dogs, horses, werewolves, dragons and aliens, BigShocked.com is probably the perfect site. It's also worth checking out, though less well-known, if you want to upgrade your male sex toys but don't want to spend as much money as other high-end sex toy stores. It's also a store that curious rubber lovers will want to check out, even if they don't like monster dicks. You might find a new hobby. You might even find a new hobby.